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WWPP: When Will Pappu Pass?

Though India’s ruling party – BJP – is yet to release its election manifesto for the 2019 Lok Sabha elections, the principal opposition party – Congress – released their manifesto yesterday (02 April), with party president Rahul Gandhi (fondly called Pappu by many Indians) at centrestage, flanked by his Mummy Sonia Gandhi on one side, and Accidental Prime Minister Dr. Manmohan Singh on the other.

If the Congress Manifesto was released a day earlier, one would have assumed that it was an April Fool’s Day joke on India’s 1.35 billion people.

We Will Deliver – is the title of the manifesto. It can be summarised as:

IN SUMMARY, WE WILL MAKE INDIA A LAWLESS STATE WHERE CORRUPTION RETURNS IN FULL FORCE, CRIMINALS ARE NOT PUNISHED, THE ARMED FORCES ARE WEAKENED AND THE ECONOMY IS CRIPPLED. IN DOING SO, WE WILL DELIVER A FREE AND SAFE PACKAGE TO CHINA AND PAKISTAN IN DOING WHATSOEVER THEY WISH IN THE GEOPOLITICS OF ASIA.

NOW LET US SEE HOW CONGRESS WILL EFFECTIVELY DELIVER INDIA’S ECONOMY TO HELL AND INFLATION TO RECORD HIGH LEVELS:

THE TOTAL COMES TO ₹23.25 LAKH CRORES PER YEAR.

GOI’S TOTAL ANNUAL RECEIPTS ARE JUST ₹20.80 LAKH CRORES. ASSUMING A 8% ANNUAL GROWTH, THIS WILL GO UP TO ₹29.85 LAKH CRORES BY 2023-24.

TO MEET CONGRESS PROMISES, ADDITIONAL REVENUES OF A WHOPPING 77.9% WILL BE NEEDED. Since Congress says it will maintain Fiscal Deficit to below 3% and Revenue Deficit to below 1%, the only way this is possible is by increasing taxes substantially, unless the PARIWAAR is planning to gift its “family jewels” to the nation – it’s high time they did that, anyways.

Some people say that this nonsensical manifesto is just to weaken Narendra Modi and the BJP, as the Congress knows that it is realistically not anywhere close to winning the 2019 elections; so it is focusing on 2024 instead, by which time the then 54-year-old Pappu is expected to pass.

On the subject of hurting BJP and Modi, I beg to differ. Over the past year or so, Congress was gaining traction, and was inching close to winning about 125-135 seats on its own, increasing its tally by 84-107% compared with the 2014 elections. After this poorly thought-off and completely disastrous manifesto, the Congress tally is unlikely to cross 115 seats. And who will gain the 10-20 seats that Congress will lose because of its manifesto? Obviously, BJP/NDA.

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